Homecoming
What are some ways you come home to yourself?
Home is more than just where the heart is, it is a place where you long to return again and again. Yes, that can be a physical place or in another person’s presence, but more importantly, home can be yourself.
But what exactly does it mean to come home to yourself?
It can be showing up as your full self without masks or apologies (authenticity). It can be a quiet calling that you can never truly ignore no matter how far you go or try to avoid it (intuition). It can be aligning your life and actions with the values you espouse (integrity). It can be living your life in such a way that you treat each day like the gift that it is (intention).
“It's not the voice that's loudest. It's the one that feels most like home.” -Astrid Nygaard on intuition (Between Fear and Intuition)
For me, there are also signals when I am not home in myself. When I am impatient or quick to anger, my body tenses up and my words get sharper. When I am overly reactive and not treating others how I want to be treated, I feel regret. When I let the opinions of others start to dictate my life, I make choices based on what I feel I should do instead of what I actually want or need to do, and feel resentful in the process. When I let fear take control and hijack my nervous system, I give away my power and neglect what I feel most called to do.
Whenever I realize I have drifted away, there are several ways that help me find my way back home.
Solitude. Prioritizing solitude and introspection becomes a necessity. Creating space for these quiet moments helps me find my center again and make decisions that are aligned with my values instead of my emotions.
Nature. Being in nature is medicine. Whether it is a walk in the park, hike through the forest, or simply sitting outside staring into the trees, this is the easiest way for me to find stillness.
Meditation. While I sometimes struggle with focus and consistency with meditation, it never fails to redirect me to a much better place. The Insight Timer app is an amazing resource and I particularly love guided meditations by Sarah Blondin and Kenneth Soares.
Writing. Journaling/writing helps me release and transmute negative thoughts and feelings, as well as discover new insights and find more joy.
Reading. Taking the time to get out of my head and look at the world through a different lens often brings new perspective and more gratitude.
Music. Listening to music and letting the lyrics linger is often cathartic and inspiring.
Prayer. Prayer can take many forms depending on your belief system. As an Episcopalian, I lean on my faith to help navigate life’s peaks and valleys, and everywhere in between. Whenever I struggle to find the words, I give myself grace and focus more on what is on my heart instead of the words that may or may not come out.
Community. When faced with challenges, my instinct/trauma response is to retreat and isolate myself. The antidote to this (and many other problems in the world) is community, such as family, friends, neighbors, a book or other club, volunteer groups, faith communities, and online groups. Whatever community feels like in the moment, reaching for it and asking for help when I need it is always helpful.
“When one is at home in oneself, one is integrated and enjoys a sense of balance and poise. In a sense that is exactly what spirituality is: the art of homecoming.” -John O’Donohue (To Bless the Space Between Us)
As the world keeps turning and you race to keep up, coming home to yourself is vital. When you feel like your day or life is spinning out of control, it may be the only real way out. And whenever you lose your way, just remember you can always choose to come home to yourself.
What are some ways you come home to yourself?
